-> The shimmering holes in the jar of the sky are the tapestry of entangled neon fairy lights of the Universe. The most ancient of nursery rhymes ever warbled, the wonderment of the wild, the stars.
Stars, the holes in the jar of the sky poked by the space dust and countless unnamed, untamed vapors of the cosmos comfort me.
“Why?” You ask. Well, dear reader, here are my top two reasons and this is not a clickbait:
Stars bring comfort to me because they have traveled for light-years, more prehistoric than the preceding fossils of some bizarre creature in my bones.
They have traveled for billions of years when the concept of times was merely an illusion, a rumor spread like a wildfire by some number obsessed person high on weed. Anyway, they have traveled for billions of years and they stop.
Stop, right in front of my feet, and mold into a shadow so small, a documentation of my soul. These wonder holes, these celestial dreams shed a spotlight on me in my onyx-grey breathless times.
A tsundere like me cares too much about the spotlight but you never heard these words from my lips, dear reader.
They are a wreck of a gorgeous reminiscence, an over-ripened too sweet yet rotten memory, mumbled in whispers by the dust of the Universe which taste like raspberries, presumably, murmur, “I am not alone.”
I am not alone. I am not alone.
-> The pack of wolves.
A murder of crows.
The herd of sheep.
The flock of birds,
The loneliness of humans.
In these onyx-grey breathless times, the tapestry of entangled neon lights of the Universe stay, It resides in the abode beneath my feet like an unloved, devoted slave.
The guardian angel sent by the celestial dreams stay. The tiny documentation of my soul stays. The Shadow stays. It cannot cuddle me or hug me tight but it stays. It cannot rock and lull my insomnia to sleep but it stays.
It stays, dammit. The “one” in the loneliness of humans stays and sometimes that is enough. Nope, more than enough to comfort me.
–> The stars and the shadows have made a blood pact to protect me however sometimes I cannot help but overthink if they will ever break it someday. After all, they are made of space dust, the dust residing in a wild, unknown, uncharted, presumably an illusion of a dimension, and less importantly, aren’t blood-pacts meant to be broken?
Can the unknown ever be trusted?
How can I trust something that does not even breathe life or if it does it is a completely different state of existence than me?
Does trusting a stupid hole in the sky make me more stupid because I have already trusted something that breathes life like me and that trust has just been ruptured like a tire in a downtown garage and spit into the charcoal?
If people cannot be trusted, can things, wild fable-like celestial things that you hold onto be trusted?
If something or someone that brings you comfort cannot be trusted then, why hold onto them?
Yes, dear reader, are you with me? Did you finally realize this is not a clickbait but a tirade of my unhealthy trust issues? I know you are wishing the stars that this was the former rather than the latter because it may be too early in the morning for you (also pun intended if you are too sleepy to notice it.)
On some days I lead an army of brain cells to an aggrieved war of insatiable trust issues over stupid holes of the sky made lovingly with wayward chemicals.
Handle with care, people say. I am a klutz, I say.
And on some days, the dust of the Universe which tastes like raspberries, presumably, mumbles, the verses of the peace treaties of war in whispers as though the tired brain cells will hear their arch nemesis.
“You hold onto me darling cause you are a part of the loneliness of humans, the one in the loneliness of humans and my sweet, loneliness makes you do crazy things, crazy crazy things that even the jar of the sky cannot contain,”
It pauses for a dramatic effect before the exit, duh! dear reader, “and that is why the sky has holes.”
//”Holes in the Sky Jar”// Enigma
Copyright © 2016-2020 Enigma. All rights reserved.
Picture Credits: Google Images
This piece is dated back to a diary entry I wrote a couple of months ago. It does sound quite cynical and dark but trust me, I am a happy person or am I? Just kidding. I thought this piece was worthy enough to be posted here when I re-read my archive of wayard scribbles.
It has been a long time and it is always a nice feeling to come back on my safe space at WordPress. I hope you are all happy and healthy. Lastly, Happy Pride Month to everyone out there! Let us always uplift each other and to all my LGBTQIA+ community, I am proud of you for being you. I truly hope someday we don’t even require to ask acceptance from the so-called society for being who we are, unapologetically and shamelessly.